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I'm a Licensed Psychotherapist, Entrepreneur, and Writer. I write about mental health, social issues, entrepreneurship, writing, and personal finance.
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Did you see the Netflix series, Love is Blind?
If not, you need to stop what you’re doing and immediately go binge on it. It’s highly addictive. Like trying to eat just one M&M…you can’t watch just one episode.
How does a show about single strangers falling in love and getting engaged before seeing each other create such obsession?
It’s got all the elements to captivate your attention and make you want more.
Human beings are naturally obsessed with love and relationships because being connected to each other is a basic human need that provides a feeling of comfort and safety. And this show is all about love connections.
It’s got just enough drama to keep you curious…fascinated…and wondering what will happen next…
…but not so much that it makes you feel anxious or afraid to walk away from the TV for 2 minutes to pee and refill your wine glass.
It’s playful and fun…completely entertaining…and you feel like you’ve got a VIP backstage pass into the intimate details of people’s lives. You get to see it all unfold right before your very eyes!
Once you start watching the show, all these elements suck you in, and you start thinking about the show ALL THE TIME.
You NEED to find out if Jessica is going to finally have sex with Mark…or if Lauren will chicken out at the alter and break Cameron’s heart.
You figure out ways to get all your work done as fast as possible so you have extra time to watch the show…it becomes a top priority…because you WANT more….you NEED more NOW!
Wouldn’t it be nice if you could feel just as obsessed with tending to your finances?
If Love is Blind were about money (yes, let’s go there for a minute), you’d turn that show off in a flash and immediately remove it from your watch list.
The money drama would be too realistic…too anxiety provoking…and you’d likely bite your nails to stubs as you watched all the messy money situations unfold.
Most women have complicated feelings about money…like fear that there business won’t make the kind of money they want…anxiety about living paycheck to paycheck…overwhelm from all the debt they’re carrying…guilt and shame over uncontrolled spending.
All these icky feelings lead to avoidance. It’s just too stressful to think about money…or look at the numbers…so the bills get stuffed in the back of the desk drawer while you pull the covers over your head and wish for a magic money fairy to wave her wand and make all your money troubles disappear.
I can tell you from experience that wishing away your money issues…and avoiding your finances…only makes problems worse, not better.
If you want to end money drama…make more money in your business…pay off debt…control spending…and feel confident in your financial decisions…you’ve got to face your money troubles head on.
You’ve got to make your money a priority…set aside time for it…and tend to your finances consistently…just like you set aside time to savor the next episode of Love is Blind.
But who the hell wants to do that, right?
Money is so confusing…and boring. You’d rather get a bikini wax than look at another spreadsheet or budget.
The trick to putting an end to money drama and getting in control of your finances is to make the whole process feel as exciting, entertaining, fun, and obsession-worthy as you feel about watching Love is Blind.
Here’s how to make that happen…
You should “date your money”.
Say what?
Like it or not, you’re already in a relationship with your money. You use money everyday…make decisions about money everyday…work to earn money everyday. Everyday from now until you die, you’ll need money.
As such, you’ll want to make your relationship with money the healthiest…sexiest…most enjoyable relationship possible so you can reach your financial goals and experience the life you want (with your money’s help).
So, you need to treat your money relationship like you would a romantic relationship and make time for it…make it a priority in your life…and look forward to engaging with your finances just like you made Love is Blind a priority and looked forward to watching episode after episode.
When you start personifying money…thinking about it as it if were a person…and relate the way you behave with money to how you would want to behave in a romantic relationship…
…it all makes so much more sense…and the confusion and overwhelm disappear…because you have a lot more experience with romantic relationships than you do with money.
Scheduling “money dates” where you spend quality time with your money to see where it’s going and what it’s been up to feels like a VIP backstage pass into your own financial life…
…and you start to feel excited, curious, and obsessed with your money and all the awesome things you can do with it.
Reframing the way you look at your finances and putting a positive spin on the whole process is as life changing as Barnett and Amber falling in love, ravishing each other after finally seeing one another, and saying “I do” after dating for only 3 weeks.
Hey, if two strangers can fall in love that fast and live happily ever after, you can do the same with your money.
There are a million ways to have a fun, flirty money date…just like there are a million ways to have a fun date night with your hottie.
The most important part of dating your money is scheduling money dates consistently…because your money feels lonely and unappreciated when you ignore it.
And if you allow huge spans of time to exist between money dates, there’s just too much to catch up on…
…like if you wait 3 weeks in between each episode of Love is Blind, you’d have to re-watch the previous episode to refresh your memory of what happened last.
Aim to have a money date once a week for an hour. Use that time to create a spending plan, figure out which debts should be paid off first, dream about what you’ll do with your money once it starts flowing into your business, or anything else that helps you make progress on your financial goals.
Make each money date fun and flirty by adding in some pleasure while you work on your finances…like a hot vanilla latte, some slow jams playing in the background, or some essential oil aromatherapy.
Need a little more help getting started with dating your money? Want some fun, flirty money date ideas to help you fall in love with your money (instead of avoiding it)?
I got you, boo.
Download the free Date Your Money Planner right here.
It’s got all the elements to captivate your attention and make you want more time with your money…and serves up seven sexy money date ideas you can book right now.
I'm a Licensed Psychotherapist, Entrepreneur, and Author. I write about mental health, social issues, entrepreneurship, writing, and personal finance. I'm also the host of the Dread Talks podcast and author of Money Therapy: How to start a love affair with money and transform your life.