I’ve never had a new car
…or a fancy one…or one that’s anything above base model. Every vehicle I’ve ever driven (a whopping total of 3) has been used and extremely affordable…because I could never afford more than that.
My Mitsubishi Endeavor was my favorite. It was safe, reliable and perfect for hauling around dogs, kids and large home improvement supplies…which is probably why I drove it for 10 years!
…but for as much as I appreciated it’s good qualities, I secretly wished it was a shiny, black Audi Q7 with leather interior, sunroof and heated seats.
Aw…my dream car…a sexy, luxurious Audi. *Drooling*
FACE SLAP. Snap out of the daydream. I knew I’d never be able to afford a car like that.
…at least that’s what I thought back then.
But over the past ten years, many transformations have taken place.
Like:
- Creating a healthier relationship with money and kicking old, limiting money beliefs to the curb.
- Using a budget that shows me how much money I have and where its going.
- Sticking to the freakin’ budget so I don’t go into debt.
- Paying off ALL my debt to avoid the living paycheck to paycheck cycle of doom.
- Saving and investing to make my money work for me (instead of working more hours for more money).
And you know what…as a result of making those money changes, I was able to make the most indulgent, expensive purchase of my life…
…I bought a shiny, black 2017 Audi Q7…with the freakin’leather interior, sunroof and heated seats. *Still drooling*
When I bought it, I experienced a variety of feelings…
- Excitement & Joy: Because I’d waited so long for this car and now I finally had it! Its what I’d been wanting for years. It was a dream come true.
- Success & Accomplishment: Every time I sit in the Audi, I feel like I’ve made it. I feel successful and accomplished. I feel proud that the hard work I poured into my business and money management paid off.
- Guilt & Shame: My Ego voice kicked in saying, “Who do you think you are getting something like this? How materialistic of you to spend so much on a car. What did you do to deserve something so great? What will other people think of you now?”
Ouch. The guilt and shame that surfaced caught me off guard. I started to worry what other people would think about my new car…
…would they see me as materialistic? Was I being materialistic?
Would they see me as a “rich bitch”? Or arrogant? Or selfish? Or entitled?…
…did I see those qualities in myself? Did I buy the Audi to prove something or “keep up with the Jones’?
This train of thought unleashed some hard core self-reflection.
Here’s what I discovered:
- My most indulgent purchase ever revealed I still have A LOT of inner work to do when it comes to my money beliefs. Clearly, I still have limiting beliefs about my own self worth and what I truly deserve. (P.S. We don’t get what we deserve…we get what we BELIEVE we deserve. So, if you’ve got limiting beliefs about self worth, you won’t allow abundance to flow into your life. Keep a close eye out for this and keep doing that tough inner work.)
- Caring about what other people think of me is a great way to ruin joy. Concerning myself with other people’s opinions ripped away the joy and excitement I’d felt initially…so I cut that crap out. (P.S. People will always judge you for something…and it’s none of your business what other people think. The only think that matters is what YOU think.)
- Having nice things doesn’t change who I am. I had to remind myself of my true essence…kind, generous, down to earth…and ignore my Ego and all its lies. (P.S. The car you drive, the house you live in and the clothes you wear don’t define who you are. In fact, none of those things mean shit about you. Your thoughts and actions make you who you are.)
- Material things don’t make us happy…but we can experience happiness from material things. I didn’t buy the Audi so I could be happy; I was already happy when I bought it. But having it makes me feel even happier.(P.S. The happiness we feel from material objects isn’t really about the thing itself; its about the feeling we experience from having it…like the feeling of success, accomplishment and excitement. The feeling is always what we’re after.)
Moral of the story:
Work hard. Take control of your money. Shift your limiting beliefs. Stop worrying about what other people think. Enjoy your riches by spending your money on whatever the hell you want. Live your dream life.
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Nicole Iacovoniis a psychotherapist, writer, wealth coach, and spiritual guide on a mission to teach women how to harness the power of their minds to create wealthy, purpose-driven lives.